a yarn/thread/fiber loving fool with MS

Birthdays

On Saturday, Sept 3, I will be 52.
I HATE BIRTHDAYS. Not because I’m another year older, age is well….. a number.
I’ve NOT had good birthdays in the past years. I think it started when Michael broke up with me the week before my birthday so many years ago. Since then it’s been a series of family drama. Mostly involving my Dad having one of his episodes and “having” to go to the ER. Then there’s the “oh it’s your birthday..well happy birthday” statements from my Mom. It takes too much effort for her to say it.
I was so damn sick last summer I almost did not make it to 51. I was expecting a bit more than just afterthought words. But NOT EVEN A GDMFing CARD. Over the weekend my mother & son were discussing they planned on getting one of those cookies & cream cakes on their next trip the store, I jokingly pipped in and said with a Birthday Candle on it. My mother shot me the dirtiest damn look, like “how dare you”. And she wonders why her middle daughter has distanced herself from this family. They are emotional vampires. No matter how much you care about them, it’s never returned.
I expect this year to be no different.
I want to go back to D.C., but I don’t know when that will happen.
I’m going to stop this now before I become a blubbering fool.

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